My mom just got home from Jogja and she complained to me that my dad has been on the computer for a long time or watching the tv for a long time (it’s true, because it’s midnight now and it was just 10 mins ago when she said this).
My mom called him up. He went up. I, trying to become an intercessor, told my dad gently how my mom wants him to spend time with her than with the tv or computer. I thought he was probably gonna say, “Awww mama…” and then laugh or something.
The fact was that he became mad instantly and said to my mom, “You tell untrue things about me. And you tell it to our kid. Jangan ngomong yang bukan-bukan dong, ma. Aku nggak suka.”
My mom got sad, of course! I was sad too and surprised… I went out to go back to my room…. But I stayed infront of their door to eavesdrop their conversation. I didn’t hear any word from mom. But I heard papa said, “kamu jangan ngomong yang bukan-bukan deh. Bikin panas banget nih. Kalo emang kamu mau aku sama kamu ya tinggal panggil aja, nggak usah ngomong yang bukan-bukan ke anaknya.” he said these words in an angry tone.
There I was, standing, with heart aching, asking quietly for forgiveness to my mom….because I couldn’t be there to stand up for her. I was too afraid.
In a way, I understand that my dad does not want my mom to say that because he watches the tv or plays the pc, he doesn’t miss her. He just wants my mom to tell him straightaway to come to him and not think of negative things instead, because he does miss her; he just wants to watch tv right now. But in another way, I understand the fact that my mom hates it that he’s always in front of the tv and pc and spends a lot of time to it! Too much time is spent there, I can witness myself.
This post is impulsive because I just have to let it out. And for once, this is the most personal thing I’ve ever written online. I’m sorry, pa, ma, kak, ci, for sharing this. I was all alone.
I’m sure these kinds of things happens to a lot of us. It’s not a controversial thing. I just need a friend to share about this. Right this moment. Tumblr and God are my friends at the moment.
Oh gosh, now I feel a lot better. :’)
Not so afraid anymore.